Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Monday Rant (Delayed): Obliviousness

Pay attention. This is important.

Stop staring off into space, stop thinking about which foot moves next, stop thinking about the argument you had with someone last night. Pay attention to what you're doing at this moment.

See that? That's a sign, a label. It's trying to provide you with important information - perhaps the name of a street, or the contents of that jar. Do not ignore it - read the damn thing.

Hello? Yeah, over here. I'm still talking to you. Fucking look at me. I'm going to provide you with important information. Information you will need in the near future.

Yo! Stop that, asstard! Your strangely-coloured cellphone is not critical right now - I am. Notice my presence? This is the most important first step for you. The next important step is to listen to what I'm saying. After that, you will need to look around you. The final step, should you actually progress this far, will be to make a Crick-damned fucking decision and act on it. Doing nothing is, sadly for your skill-set, not an option.

OK, you managed to screw up even that simple sequence. Smiling at me like that won't help - you don't look apologetic, you look moronic and mocking.

You know what? Forget it.



Carlo said...

Sweet! I'm glad you're starting to use non-religious expletives as well! It's important that we began taking the names of REAL and IMPORTANT things in vain in order to show our anger... I think it helps ground humanism.

TheBrummell said...

Actually, I was doing it partly because of the "REAL and IMPORTANT" thing, but mostly because I liked the way you were doing it - the names chosen are famous biologists, which means pretty obscure to the majority of people.

Blogger word verification: hheey

Perhaps that's an omen.